Monthly Archives: January 2021

Lazy Lady Gaga (Rousse)

I gatecrashed a gathering of famous female pop stars and actors in the Durness community hall. I persuaded them that I was their fitness instructor and insisted that nobody was exempt from my exercise class. None of them really wanted … Continue reading

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Free trial liposuction, force-fed kipper, and ferocious wolves (Rousse)

I was disgusted at the rope of white marshmallow-like goo extracted from my midriff by the white-uniformed beautician. My first experience of liposuction was definitely going to be my last. I asked the beautician to stop my free trail, gathered … Continue reading

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Kneeling toilet is a safe haven for jewellery stash (Rousse)

No wonder I kept getting lost in the hotel. Due to a booking mishap, every day TPR and I were moved from one bedroom to another. Although annoying, it would have been so much worse if the weather had been … Continue reading

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Turning down Loughborough (Rousse)

I performed well in my interview for a chair at Loughborough University, and it came as no surprise when Eric (the Head of School) offered me the job. I was delighted with this outcome, as was AM, who had always … Continue reading

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Disguised David and Victoria Beckham murder distraction (Rousse)

While sharped-eyed tourists spotted semi-disguised David and Victoria Beckham strolling down Edinburgh’s Royal Mile, my murderous rampage around the city was still secret – but not for much longer… I thought that it would be safe to store the latest … Continue reading

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Expensive Scottish border sandwiches, sandals, and snow (Rousse)

As we crossed the border at Carter Bar, I calculated that we would reach my mother’s house around 4pm. By this time my passengers would be rather hungry. I would not take any chances on the stock of my mother’s … Continue reading

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Boris Johnson wedding (Rousse)

As aunt to one of Boris Johnson’s children, I was invited to the big family wedding.

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UK parakeet problem hits Edinburgh (Rousse)

I pulled back the shutters and looked out of the window of the first floor. Imagine my surprise when I saw a someone come flying through the sky on the back of a man-sized robin! Also, on the branches of … Continue reading

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Fine art graduates offered new opportunity to market their work (Rousse)

I came up with my new business idea when standing next to a large black Edinburgh street refuse bin. Inside I could see several cellophane-wrapped mounted pictures. They were left over from the recent degree show at the art college. … Continue reading

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Apple purée spillage (Rousse)

I accidentally spilt a vat of apple purée over the entire floor of the staff common room of Sheffield University’s iSchool – but nobody seemed to care.

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