Author Archives: Dreamaticus

Big knickers for Katie Price and her pal (Rousse)

Posted on September 19, 2019

I helped Katie Price and another glamour model shop for big knickers. Advertisements

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Bring your own bacon (Belle)

Posted on September 18, 2019

I wasn’t managing the conference stress very well. When a delegate requested a bacon sandwich, I jumped up on stage and shouted “Buy your own bloody pig!” over the microphone.

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Scottish hurricane transport (Rousse)

Posted on September 18, 2019

One minute I was watching the rain lash against a top bedroom window of a guest house on the Isle of Lewis. The next I was whipped up from my seat by the force of the hurricane and transported to … Continue reading →

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A quick house move (Rousse)

Posted on September 16, 2019

TPR and I had just moved into a massive fully-furnished modern house with views across the valley. Keen for his children to enjoy a country childhood, I persuaded PC and his family to take over one of the wings. After … Continue reading →

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Death by double knitting (Rousse)

Posted on September 15, 2019

The members of my old running group were gathering in the gym. When I spotted the SEB joking with them I found it it very difficult to resist the urge to strangle her with a length of purple double knitting … Continue reading →

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Drug dealing in Dublin (Rousse)

Posted on September 12, 2019

Seated in the back of the car to the left of me, JS asked why she would not be joining the book group trip to Dublin. I found it hard to believe that she had forgotten all about her forthcoming … Continue reading →

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Revolting book group grub (Rousse)

Posted on September 10, 2019

The meal was a complete disaster. I should never have volunteered to bring food that I had cooked at my own house to JS’s flat to serve to my book group companions. Somehow in transit the pork chop suey had … Continue reading →

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