Author Archives: Dreamaticus

A sexy orthopaedic surgeon (Rousse)

I was looking forward to talking to NP and SF over the meal, but as we sat down to dinner one of the guests declared that he was an orthopaedic surgeon and very interested in assessing my leg pain. This … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Hooking a salmon in one cast (Rousse)

I walked along the river bank with my father. We saw a few people fishing, apparently without success. My father boasted ‘Watch me, I can pull one out with single cast’. He stepped down to the water, expertly sent his … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Luggage problems on Lewis (Rousse)

Our flight from Stornoway was in two hours at 9pm and our only means of transport from Uig to the airport was a set of four brand new three speed bikes. Even if we were to cycle at top speed … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Poor plane facilities and a pair of pale green eyes (Rousse)

JC booked a holiday for us all in Spain. She and her husband kindly collected us by car and drove us to the airport 300 miles south. There were all sorts of problems with the plane’s facilities. My Canadian cousin … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Husband hires hit man to kill off wife (Rousse)

It was the end of our holiday. I had almost finished packing the bike panniers in preparation for our journey home when a man rushed into our room, then grabbed and bundled me into the back of his car. He … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Paul McCartney and ‘PS I love you’ (Rousse)

Sir Paul McCartney was the surprise special guest at the party. All the tiny guests (aged six or under) seemed to recognise the celebrity status of the visitor, and gathered closely around him. When invited to ask questions, however, none … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Lurid art birthday gift (Rousse)

My colleague FC led me to a basement. Here she had assembled an art exhibition with all pieces displayed for sale. I selected a lurid night time scene in dark oils from the freezer and took it home as a … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Award talk with Sir Mark Walport (Rousse)

ASDA had deserted the deep-sea themed shopping centre on the outskirts of town, as had the giant aquarium retailer. The enormous concrete sculptures of marine creatures now looked rather forlorn in the neglected flower beds. Sainsbury’s moved to the site … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

How not to change a nappy (Rousse)

My status in the household was rather ambiguous as the former au pair girl. Should I really be left in charge of the children three decades later? That question was answered when I attempted to change the sodden nappy on … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Salt mine offers ‘magic’ treatment for eczema (Rousse)

It took a long time to cycle the single tracks roads across the wilderness to the immense quarry, but it was worth the effort. The excavation was enormous. I couldn’t wait to see it close up. We dropped our bikes … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment