Dreamaticus populae
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Recent reveries
- Lost Middle Earth maps (Rousse)
- A drug-dealing pensioner (Rousse)
- Beggar bleeds to death in gutter (Rousse)
- Shaft jumping in Exeter (Rousse)
- Greedy goldfish and slapdash workmen ruin house and garden (Rousse)
- Courtship rituals for the widowed and widowed-to-be (Rousse)
- Self-immolation by train (Rousse)
- To Stornoway by bus via Perth (Rousse)
- Waiting for the headmistress (Rousse)
- 2023 sycamore seedling infestation reaches new heights (Rousse)
- Summer weather in the Outer Hebrides (Rousse)
- Pork for Jews (Rousse)
- A wedding in the north Lake District (Rousse)
- The dead with an Egyptian theme (Rousse)
- Gifts and guests shattered in Sunderland (Rousse)
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Monthly Archives: January 2011
Rousse battles unconvention at a funeral, naked on the train, and with her man
It was a tragedy. Cousin R caught a cold on the golf course and promptly dropped dead. Now everyone was gathered for his less than conventional funeral. This included not only a scruffy, elderly bride in a dirty mauve dress … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged bath, bride, chapel, coffin, commercial, cousin, date, dead, dress, drug addict, drugs, Edinburgh, father, funeral, Golf, homeless, information service, librarian, mother, mourner, naked, order of service, pale, pew, rap band, sister, train
2 Comments
All men wear bras (Belle)
I made another one of my public proclamations to an unspecified audience. “The one thing that all the men in this country have in common is that they want to own – and WEAR – a bra.” In order to … Continue reading
Legacy of Lord of the Rings: will Gollum make adulthood unscathed? (Rousse)
CS and I wandered the campus at night, arm in arm, devising plots to make a fortune from the delivery of social media master classes. We were not alone: JK was also hard at work in his office, and we … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged blond, book, children, corridor, film, Gollum, house, Lord of the Rings, office, social media, twins
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Belle is a defective detective
Twenty years after the affair ended, I was once again dating T. The truth of the matter was I was operating undercover. T’s extended family were trailer-park villains. One-by-one they were being killed off. I watched them closely over several … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged car, cinema, detective, handcuffs, Mary Portas, mother-in-law, murder, police, pylons, Scotland Yard, sparklers, strangler
2 Comments
Brutal BBC boxing match and a black-eyed avatar (Rousse)
The finalists of BBC Scotland’s Sports Personality of the Year limbered up for the last round in Edinburgh, jogging up and down Cathedral Lane between the Paolozzi sculptures and the St James Centre. While EMc and I watched the preparation … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged avatar, BBC, BBC Scotland, BBC Scotland Sports Personality of the Year, boxing, cartoon, competition, dress, Edinburgh, eyes, Facebook, LinkedIn, Paolozzi, red, Scotland, St James Centre, St Mary's Cathedral, Twitter
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Archbishop of Canterbury reigns over Wembley and David Cameron settles into Edinburgh pied-à-terre (Rousse)
I was summoned to 10 Downing Street, but I didn’t know why. The house was as packed as a pub on a Friday night and I had to force myself through a throng of MPs, including George Osbourne, to reach … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged 10 Downing Street, Archbishop of Canterbury, award, bagpipes, bumpf, card, carrier bags, Christmas, Christmas tree, conference, David Cameron, door, Edinburgh, flat, George Osbourne, government, grass, honour, jacket, Kendal, letter, London, magic, medieval, minstrels, MP, PhD, pied-à-terre, prime minister, robe, satin, school, secret service, shirt, stadium, Tesco, University of Birmingham, wall, Wembley
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Belle is a blank canvas
I was the victim of mistaken identity in Dusseldorf. Or was it a set-up? I had been taken to a town centre apartment by a woman I hadn’t seen for over 30 years so I could change my clothes. While … Continue reading
UK’s cheapest print cartridges found in… North Berwick? (Rousse)
With his mop of blond hair and angelic five year-old face he made an unlikely criminal, but when I confronted this gun-toting infant terrorist in the wood I was terrified. Although my revolver rested safely in my handbag, it would … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged A1, blond, bus, cartridges, criminal, gun, handbag, ink, John Lewis, Musselburgh, North Berwick, printer, pyjamas, revolver, shoot-out, terrorists, TPR
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Diamonds are forever (Rousse)
How could this be possible: a variation on the game of Scrabble, dumbed down for adults? The man who invited me to play poured the tiles on to the table. They were the size of large dominoes. Rather than displaying … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged cards, diamonds, dominoes, great-grandmother, Scrabble
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