Bus fatalities on the Isle of Lewis (Rousse)

Posted on May 15, 2026 by Dreamaticus

TPR and I gave up walking and caught the 38 bus – bang on time at 17:01 – for the rest of our journey.

I sat at the back with a young Polish man who marvelled at the standing stones and stone circles strewn across the Lewisian moorland. TPR chose to travel at the front, next to the bus driver.

I was fully conscious at the time of the accident, and throughout its aftermath. I remember the sharp bend in the road, the bright yellow gorse along the verge, and the screams of the passengers as the vehicle overturned. I was the first to walk free of the wreckage and dial 999.

As for TPR, he was crushed to death alongside the bus driver.

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Risk of bias in ‘The Rest is history’ episodes puzzles Sandbrook and Holland (Rousse)

Posted on May 15, 2026 by Dreamaticus

Dominic Sandbrook looked aghast when the Rest is history panel member from York University interrupted him. What right did he have to cut the recording of Sandbrook’s opening line of the latest episode?

‘You must drop these background narratives at the start of a new topic,’ the panel member commanded. ‘I was at a conference in Newcastle last week where we all agreed that such context setting is completely inappropriate. For a start, it always introduces bias to the later analysis.’

Sandbrook turned to his co-presenter Tom Holland with a look that read ‘How on earth do we explain the political and historic context of early twentieth century Finland without reference to prior decades of Russian and Swedish rule?’

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‘Dead’ sister alive in Spain (Rousse)

Posted on May 2, 2026 by Dreamaticus

I was on holiday in Spain rummaging through junk on a flea market stall when my phone rang. My sister J was calling with news that we had feared for years: S had died. What made it worse was that our sister had taken her own life in her boyfriend’s flat in Newcastle. It was difficult for me to speak on the street, so I arranged to call back J later that day.

Unable to hide my grief, I turned to my travelling companion and passed on the tragic news. S lifted her head to stare straight back at me. ‘How can I be dead in England when I am here in Spain on holiday with you?’ she asked.

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Falling for a romance scammer (Rousse)

Posted on April 28, 2026 by Dreamaticus

He was tall, dark, handsome – and impeccably dressed in a starched white shirt adorned with gold cufflinks that peeped out of the sleeves of his sharp dark grey suit. When JM introduced him to me, I believed that I was in the company of an African prince.

I was soon besotted – so much so that on the day that I lost TPR trudging around the museum in his shabby old Barbour coat, it seemed perfectly natural for me to fall into the arms of this glamorous semi-stranger. Within minutes I was ready to give up a relationship of over four decades for an exciting new life with a handsome young man.

But then it suddenly struck me that I knew very little about this charmer who was stroking my hand. How old was he? Was he financially secure?

When he admitted that he was 32 and had ‘a few money problems’, I came to my senses.

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Matt Smith the parrot strangler (Belle)

Posted on April 23, 2026 by Dreamaticus

I was not sure why RM-H was ignoring me. He was walking down a black and white corridor in Goldsmiths College and pushing an old-fashioned pram.

Eventually he took me by my elbow and guided me towards a window. Inside we could see actor Matt Smith in the corner of the room, his hands round the neck of a green parrot.

We lifted the sash window and RM-H jumped inside to punch Matt Smith and rescue the parrot. I vaguely wondered if the pram had been for the parrot all along.

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Investing in farmland and NUFC (Rousse)

Posted on April 22, 2026 by Dreamaticus

I spent my fortune on two massive investments. The first was a large tract of coastal farmland of great archaeological significance. The second was a majority shareholding in Newcastle United football club.

I couldn’t wait to see my little sister’s reaction when she found out about my newly-bought influence on decisions at St James’ Park. I also looked forward to taking my politician pals to home fixtures there.

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Charming Saoirse Ronan chases the wrong train (Rousse)

Posted on April 19, 2026 by Dreamaticus

I knew that I was taking a chance when I boarded an LNER train at Birmingham New Street while holding a CrossCountry ticket. However, since I was Saoirse Ronan, I was pretty certain that I could charm the train manager into allowing me to travel the rest of my journey on his service.

My plan failed because this was a non-stop train to Falmouth in Cornwall, hundreds of miles beyond my intended destination.

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A bank robber and new riders (Rousse)

Posted on April 15, 2026 by Dreamaticus

JG was living off the latest £30k proceedings of his bank robbing career.

Meanwhile my sister-in-law was determined that her sons would enjoy all the privileges of a middle class upbringing.

As preparation for the boys’ first riding lesson, she made them sit on a tray over a pile of random cutlery. This would accustom them to the idea of perching on a moving saddle.

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Perils of working from home (Rousse)

Posted on April 12, 2026 by Dreamaticus

We left Captain C behind when we ran up the steps to our upstairs neighbours’ flat.

They needed to know that every time that L logged into her laptop, the black and orange logo of Hadron (her employer) was cast downstairs to all our screens. Even more embarrassing, we had been listening in to all her conference calls – both work and personal.

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Babysitting the bodiless (Rousse)

Posted on April 11, 2026 by Dreamaticus

When I agreed to look after two 5 year-olds for a colleague, I expected a couple of fully-formed human beings.

It was TPR’s old work colleague LF who found the pair of them for me at the end of a chaotic half marathon race. My charges were two 12 inch tall, fully functional, childs’ heads. LF had first spotted them rolling along the verge.

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