Monthly Archives: March 2019

Breaks on a plane (Belle)

Posted on March 31, 2019 by Dreamaticus

As the airplane taxied down the runway, the cabin crew announced the break-dancing competition. I was to go first.  My performance was lacklustre, under-rehearsed and embarrassing. I received a smattering of applause. Second to the stage was a young lad … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Brown Dubarry boot burglary (Rousse)

Posted on March 26, 2019 by Dreamaticus

All my fears were realised when it became obvious that a sneaky thief had stolen my brown Dubarry boots in a locker room switch. I blamed L, who had left the boots under a bench overnight. It was all too … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Confused in Essex with Pierce Brosnan (Belle)

Posted on March 23, 2019 by Dreamaticus

I had a lot of questions. Who had bleached my hair badly? Why was I in Essex? Why was it suddenly Christmas Day? Why were all these young people partying in my grandmother’s house? How come Aunty V looked a … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Evan Davies interviews for ‘How bad was my week?’

Posted on March 19, 2019 by Dreamaticus

My sister S drove like a maniac along the Hebridean shoreline, skidding on seaweed and only narrowly avoiding the obstacles along the way – seals, children paddling, random tourists. From the back seat I screamed at her to slow down. … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

An appropriate hair style for the almost-bald (Rousse)

Posted on March 19, 2019 by Dreamaticus

I introduced TPR to my new colleagues Jamie and Jamie. One of the Jamies admired TPR’s distinguished haircut and headwear. However, he regretted his comment the moment that TPR removed his hat. Now it was obvious that the only hair … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Super-friendly furry animals, early blooms, and stolen chocolates (Rousse)

Posted on March 19, 2019 by Dreamaticus

Four grey squirrels, each accompanied by a tiny rust-coloured baby kit, leapt from the treetops into my coat as I passed through the market. I managed to shake the squirming animals out of my clothing by the time I reached … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Junkie Genesis journal article theft (Rousse)

Posted on March 17, 2019 by Dreamaticus

I pushed past the junkies in the dark alleyway at the top of Edinburgh’s Broughton Street to enter Crombies’ temporary butcher’s shop. The butcher business taken over the halal meat emporium/paperback library/convenience store while its main shop several yards down … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Dog becomes monk (Belle)

Posted on March 15, 2019 by Dreamaticus

T the dog joined a monastery and started to wear a tiny brown habit. His official role was mouse-catcher although he let the mice go after he caught them. The CEO arrived at a building site to address a small … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

A toilet knee-trembler with Tom Hiddleston (Belle)

Posted on March 13, 2019 by Dreamaticus

Tom Hiddleston locked us into the hotel lobby toilet. He was much more into it than I was. I kept thinking about the bathroom I was supposed to be deep cleaning. Later, outside in the slush and snow, local yobbos … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Long lost auntie turns up in Brazil (Rousse)

Posted on March 11, 2019 by Dreamaticus

I was in Brazil to learn Portuguese. One day when I was out on the street (to steal a pair of black knickers to go with my navy blue patterned T shirt) I noticed from behind an old lady edging … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment