Author Archives: Dreamaticus

Northumberland to Newbury the roundabout way (Rousse)

Perhaps it was a mistake to allow the youngest member of our party to drive? The small, slim woman made so many navigational mistakes that we ended up travelling from Hexham to Corbridge via Norton. It took three hours to … Continue reading

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Dietary advice as the Pogues play Leith Walk (Rousse)

When the bill arrived I could not understand why it only came to £10.50. Surely it cost more to see the Pogues in concert on Leith Walk? SE paid with his credit card. Then someone I barely knew gave him … Continue reading

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Elevator danger (Rousse)

AL gave up his usual duties as a computing academic for life as an elevator operator. His lift was very dangerous: instead of steel, the sides were made from 1970s blue and white flowery curtains.

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Rousse the terrorist and Belle the gangster’s moll (Rousse)

I left the swimming pool at about 2:30am when I noticed that all the lights had gone out and the staff had disappeared. I caught the lift to the third floor, found my room, and pushed open the door. The … Continue reading

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More parking misery in Edinburgh (Rousse)

TPR looked great in the smart chauffeur’s uniform. He parked the Rolls Royce, dropped off his charges, and spent the afternoon with me. When he returned to his duties TPR found that the traffic wardens had plastered the vehicle with … Continue reading

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Exciting nail polish fashion and a new home at the castle (Rousse)

When TF stood up from his seat on the lower deck of the Glasgow Routemaster bus, I assumed that we had reached our stop. I was wrong. The bus was taking the reverse route so we would be on-board for … Continue reading

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Unique accommodation and party provision for Newcastle University students (Rousse)

At Newcastle University the students slept together stacked on open wooden shelves, not unlike enormous upturned printers’ blocks. They all used special fixed-gear bicycles to scale the high walls to reach their wooden cells. Unfortunately the sleeping space was very … Continue reading

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Dashed hopes of a career in consulting (Rousse)

X couldn’t wait to watch me read the emailed offer. “Look at this”, he enthused. “£1000 a day just to give advice. I can’t wait to get started on this project with you!” Once again he had completely misunderstood. First, … Continue reading

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Fears for man gone missing with lesbian murderess wife

K and H had disappeared. I was especially worried when I heard that H was a wicked lesbian murderess.

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A brainy Manchester chemistry teacher (Rousse)

I was sitting on the stage at the front of the room opening a present when someone asked ST what it was like to be so brainy. What I wanted to know was how he ended up a chemistry teacher … Continue reading

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