Tag Archives: tourists

David Tennant and the global success of mini-Yorkshire puddings (Belle)

I left the flat I shared with David Tennant to travel to the funeral. I had a police escort. Later I started to distribute miniature Yorkshire puddings out of a bread crate, leaving them outside the front doors of youth … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Unsatisfactory hotel accommodation and Bobby the dog ‘saved’ (Rousse)

TPR and I travelled to the Isle of Lewis for SG’s sister’s birthday party. When we arrived RG was busy installing pebble-proof windows. This was because unhappy tourists had recently taken to showing their displeasure by shattering the most accessible … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Child thieves adopt boy scout disguise in cash raids on Lake District hotels (Rousse)

On the final day of the conference in the Lake District I packed my bag, checked in online for my flight to Amsterdam, and then wandered down to the hotel dining room to ask for a sandwich (in French). Although … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Tom Skelton’s one-man show, a dress from Woolworths, Dave Eggers, and icing penguins (Rousse)

Although by mid-September the Edinburgh Fringe was well and truly over, a few acts had stayed in town to try their luck with the locals and last of the summer tourists. Tom Skelton of Racing Minds was still performing his … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Nantes crocodiles, Chinese tourists, and taxi services (Rousse)

When we walked out of Nantes railway station it all came back to me – especially the crocodiles that I used to pet in secret in the middle of the night when I sneaked into the zoo after hours. My … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Mislabelled marmalade crisis (Rousse)

I sat down to breakfast at my parents’ mansion. I was finally beginning to warm to the place now that I understood it layout, and was accustomed to the tourists who peered in to observe us every day. When I … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Katie Price returns to work as earnings drop (Rousse)

Katie Price (AKA Jordan) was offering her services as a beautician at Edinburgh Royal Infirmary. “Why would anyone with your wealth be waxing other people’s legs?” I asked her. “I only earn £300,000 a year”, she replied as she called … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Billy Connolly and his kids trick tourists while the Queen keeps track of village crime (Rousse)

Billy Connolly and his kids tricked tourists by hiding behind the sea wall in the west coast fishing village and jumping out whenever anyone passed by. Not far from the tricksters we tried to park our metallic green mark 4 … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Queen Victoria: stony history tutor (Rousse)

Whenever tourists complimented me on my extensive knowledge of Edinburgh I always acknowledged my source. My teacher was a statue of Queen Victoria. Most believed that the sole function of the statue was to peer blankly down on Princes Street … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Lovesick “spy” in purple fleece pyjamas goes shopping for an Easter egg at Woolworths (Rousse)

Such was my haste to accept the invitation to work again with JB and his team that I didn’t have time to dress properly for the mission. I hoped that nobody would notice that I was wearing my purple fleece … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment