Tag Archives: Spain

David Tennant and the global success of mini-Yorkshire puddings (Belle)

I left the flat I shared with David Tennant to travel to the funeral. I had a police escort. Later I started to distribute miniature Yorkshire puddings out of a bread crate, leaving them outside the front doors of youth … Continue reading

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Belle and Spain have a messy break-up

I was being manipulated into declaring war against Spain. Spain’s solicitor had written to me asking for its assets back. Without permission, my solicitor had replied that Spain could go stuff itself and we’d see it on the battlefield.

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Selling timeshares in Spain with coconut cakes and coffee (Rousse)

We knew that KMcM lived and worked in Spain, so it came as no surprise to find her in a hotel ballroom delivering a presentation on timeshares in a long shimmery black backless dress that showed off her tan. We … Continue reading

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Scandal of coffin-carrying caretakers and their enormous retirement lump sums (Rousse)

I was hidden from view, looking for something in the cloakroom under the stairs, when I heard the men clutter in. I could tell that they were heaving something very heavy. I peered round from my hiding place and saw … Continue reading

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A cocktail goes global (Belle)

I was the inventor of a new, globally famous cocktail. The ‘Angel’s Delight’ was enormously tricky to prepare, as each layer had to remain separate from the others. Crouched by the fax machine, I was busy slicing blood oranges to … Continue reading

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The Glasgow School of Spelling, David Bowie, Andy Warhol, Limmy and a retirement home for celebrities (Rousse)

It was very sweet of the organisers to remember me, but I really didn’t deserve any recognition at all at the engineering teaching awards ceremony. I suspected that BB was behind this. The biggest clue was that it was one … Continue reading

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Rousse’s trip to Spain uncovers NHS zombie and Sir Alex Ferguson’s secret ch√Ęteau

I acknowledged that this little game with passengers at Edinburgh airport was losing its appeal. Stopping dead in your tracks just to witness the reaction of people following immediately behind you is a bit childish. At the gate, and from … Continue reading

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