Tag Archives: child

Baby Yoda and the secret porn star (Rousse)

Posted on December 17, 2013 by Dreamaticus

My friend A sat down next to me on the bus. It looked like he was carrying his son in his arms, but I couldn’t be certain that this was a human baby. The first strange thing about the child … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged arms, baby, black, bus, carry, cellars, changeling, child, confess, dye, ear, ears, film, floppy, hair, human, labyrinth, like, music, naked, nappy, pale, porn, secret, son, star, Star Wars, studio, studios, town, TPR, translucent, whisper, winter, Yoda | Leave a comment

Ugly baby is an alien (Rousse)

Posted on November 24, 2013 by Dreamaticus

I was left holding the baby, and what an ugly little creature it was. I wondered why its head was so floppy and its skin so slimy. Then it opened its mouth in an evil grin that revealed a full … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged alien, baby, child, creature, evil, floppy, grin, head, mouth, needle, sharp, skin, teeth, ugly | Leave a comment

Harry Potter tattoos: the only clue to “Pedro’s” past (Rousse)

Posted on November 19, 2013 by Dreamaticus

I lost TPR during the final stage of the long journey to the US aboard an ocean liner. Occasionally I would spot him in the distance across deck, usually driving one of the small open cars used for deliveries by … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged America, authenticity, baby, body art, boot, car, cars, child, clue, companion, complexion, confront, deck, deliveries, delivery, disguise, driver, Edinburgh, family, George Heriot's School, Harry Potter, hide, Hogwarts, illegal, image, immigrant, JK Rowling, journey, labour, Latin, liner, lose, lost, Mexican, moustache, muscle, ocean, past, Pedro, questions, Scotland, seat, ship, silver, skinny, staff, tan, tattoo, tattoos, trap, US | Leave a comment

A puffin child prodigy (Rousse)

Posted on November 6, 2013 by Dreamaticus

Although I’d given up my gym membership long ago, from time to time I still popped into Virgin Active at Edinburgh’s Omni Centre. This was largely because I liked sitting in the café and pretending that it was my own … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged baby, cafe, cardboard, chair, child, club, Edinburgh, folder, folders, gym, membership, mother, Omni Centre, placement, private, prodigy, psychic, puffin, rott, rotten, son, students, talents, tomato, tomatoes, toy, toys, undergraduates, Virgin Active | Leave a comment

Hugh Grant lookalike cited in affair accusations (Rousse)

Posted on October 23, 2013 by Dreamaticus

I tried to work out why TPR and I were staying in this business hotel by peering at the badges of the other guests. One man appeared to be “the friendliest of the friendly”. This didn’t help, other than suggest … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged accusation, accusations, affair, appeal, aunt, aunties, aunts, badge, badges, bathroom, black, blame, business, case, child, court, cult, family, friendly, Fringe, golden, guest, guests, hair, hotel, Hugh Grant, husband, locks, look, lookalike, niece, raven, room, shock, suggestion, thick, town, TPR, unrecognisable, wash, worry | Leave a comment

A mismanaged meeting and three glug jugs (Rousse)

Posted on August 3, 2013 by Dreamaticus

I raced as fast as I could to the meeting. AC and JB were in hot pursuit, not far behind me. As I suspected, the A6 to Penrith was closed so we had to take a quick diversion to reach … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged A6, agenda, beating, chair, child, daughter, delight, destination, diversion, drink, glug, head, home, Indian, jug, jugs, meeting, mismanage, painful, Penrith, Principal, row, sculpture, seats, separate, table, third, watch, white, wine, woes | Leave a comment

Manners maketh man (Rousse)

Posted on July 28, 2013 by Dreamaticus

I grabbed the child. If her mother was not going to teach her any manners, I would. She answered back “You sound just like FM. I’m not going to change.” “In that case you’ll end up an obnoxious, uncouth lump … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged change, child, lump, man, manners, mother, uncouth | Leave a comment

Tossed stone is cause of Aberdeen train tragedy (Rousse)

Posted on July 23, 2013 by Dreamaticus

It was a very long walk to Aberdeen, and well after 4pm when we reached the city centre. Our first stop was the railway station. The people waiting on the platform watched a bunch of workers busily repairing the track. … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged Aberdeen, accident, blonde, bored, cause, centre, child, children, city, crash, crowd, death, doctor, fell, jump, kill, line, path, platform, railway, repair, scene, station, stone, survive, swerve, toddler, toss, track, tragedy, train, walk, woman, workers | Leave a comment

Diversionary tactics and the ugly child (Rousse)

Posted on June 12, 2013 by Dreamaticus

Although long-divorced, P and G put on a cheery show when they brought their two children to the party. I’d met the little boy before, but was unsure as to the parentage of the girl named Chloë. I wondered whether … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged achievements, boy, child, Chloë, daughter, distraction, diversionary, divorce, girl, insult, parents, pondering, report, rude, school, son, sport, tactics, ugly | Leave a comment

Old university perks (Rousse)

Posted on June 6, 2013 by Dreamaticus

Now I understood why my colleagues at Edinburgh University were more productive than me. When my friend took up her new chair there, not only was she provided with a PA, but her department also paid for her parents to … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged chair, child, colleagues, department, Edinburgh University, job, leave, maternity, PA, parents, perks, post, pregnant, professor, university, University of Edinburgh | Leave a comment