Author Archives: Dreamaticus

Police reopen case into dolly bird disappearance (Rousse)

Posted on November 21, 2011 by Dreamaticus

I dressed in the black school uniform of my little brother and sister and accompanied them to class. None of the teachers spotted that I was an over-age imposter. When one of them confiscated my silver necklace at the school … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged 1960s, book, brother, canteen, case, celebrities, confiscate, criminal, criminals, disappearance, dolly bird, Finland, gate, imposter, jewellery, journalist, London, move, moves, necklace, office, over-age, police, prime suspect, reopen, rules, school, silver, sister, swinging, tabloid, teacher, teachers, underworld, uniform, views, window, windows, workman, workmen | Leave a comment

Malcolm Bradbury and Diane Abbott predict the next bestseller (Rousse)

Posted on November 20, 2011 by Dreamaticus

The big clue as to the location of the conference was the island visible across the stretch of water to the west. If that was the Isle of Man, then this was rural Cumbria. However, it was impossible to work … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged best, best seller, bestseller, cargo, commune, conference, Cumbria, dead, Diane Abbott, Friends, gloves, island, Isle of Man, KM, knowledge management, lift, Malcolm Bradbury, next bestseller, novel, oven, paternoster, publisher, school, seller, slippery, snow, stairs | Leave a comment

Prime-time reality TV botanic bonus (Rousse)

Posted on November 19, 2011 by Dreamaticus

I was the star of a prime-time reality TV show. Cut off from the rest of the world as the team leader of six adventurers, I was only allowed one short walkie-talkie call with my family over the course of … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged bonus, botanic, challenge, collect, family, frame, identify, leader, leaf, leaves, mount, organise, parents, performance, prime-time, reality, series, show, specimen, specimens, star, task, team, television, TV, walkie-talkie, win | Leave a comment

Alice in Wonderland attraction (Rousse)

Posted on November 18, 2011 by Dreamaticus

The rules of the race stipulated that you would be disqualified if you placed a foot on concrete at any point during your run. I decided to make the wood my starting point and see what would happen. Inevitably I … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged Alice in Wonderland, attraction, clothes, concrete, dress, dressing up, Edinburgh, enlarge, London Road, phone, race, running, shrink, supper, talent, TPR, wood | Leave a comment

A rotten job in Tibet (Belle)

Posted on November 17, 2011 by Dreamaticus

I had gone to live with the ‘famous ice-makers and ice-breakers of Tibet’. It was now ice-breaking season and family groups, including tiny toddlers, were breaking the ice with pickaxes. However, as an outsider, I was required to serve an … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged fish, ice, lift, offal, production line, sofa, Tibet, tower block | Leave a comment

How to cook an elephant (Belle)

Posted on November 16, 2011 by Dreamaticus

The cooking demonstration was underway and there was a palpable ripple of excitement in the audience as the cook revealed her main ingredient (baby elephant) and the cooking method (fiery pizza oven). Appalled, I decided the best thing for me … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged chef, elephant, France, gap year, hospital, kitchen, pizza oven, school, toilets | Leave a comment

Basking sharks and a bikini malfunction (Rousse)

Posted on November 15, 2011 by Dreamaticus

I splashed along the Hebridean shoreline on a beautiful summer day. For company I had the birds and an occasional seal. I even spotted a few small basking sharks surprisingly close to the water’s edge. I couldn’t understand why TPR … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged America, basking, basking shark, basking sharks, bathing costume, bikini, bird, birds, boot, campus, car, cotton, gym, Hebridean, Hebrides, job, knickers, offer, pool, sea, seal, seals, shark, sharks, shoreline, summer, swim, swimming, swimming costume, swimsuit, TPR, transparent, US, water | Leave a comment

Small frustrations blight playgirl lifestyle (Belle)

Posted on November 15, 2011 by Dreamaticus

For no apparent reason I was now living the life of an international playgirl. I was staying in the world’s best hotels. I was dating rich, handsome men from countries I had never heard of. I could ski! My latest … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged boyfriend, complaint, hairdresser, hotel, international playgirl, jewellery, rich, ski-ing, stairs, telephone, the Alps | Leave a comment

Mistaken identity and a monkey (Rousse)

Posted on November 14, 2011 by Dreamaticus

At first it was flattering when delegates approached me to say how much they admired my work, but soon it became obvious that they were mistaking me for someone else. I had never written a single word of research related … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged address, ape, beard, business, business card, card, conference, delegate, delegates, handbag, identity, industry, knowledge management, lady, logo, mistaken, monkey, old, pet, research, shipping | Leave a comment

A spot from which to watch the boys go by (Rousse)

Posted on November 13, 2011 by Dreamaticus

I peered through the bannister spindles at the top of the stairs at the White House, watching the men arrive. I was terribly excited because amongst them were some of the boys who had not made it to the recent … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged bannister, boy, boys, men, reunion, school, spindles, Stockton, Stockton-on-Tees, White House | Leave a comment