The big clue as to the location of the conference was the island visible across the stretch of water to the west. If that was the Isle of Man, then this was rural Cumbria. However, it was impossible to work out the conference theme from the mix of delegates. There was nothing obvious that Diane Abbott MP or Professor Sir Malcolm Bradbury had in common with my school friends NG and FF, commune favourite NY, or so-called knowledge management guru DS.

Still, I learnt a few interesting things from participating at this event: (1) all our oven gloves need a good wash; (2) you’ll be crushed to death if you attempt to travel on a paternoster lift designed for cargo; (3) when it snows indoors you should always avoid using the slippery stairs.

The best news, however, came in Professor Bradbury’s declaration that Dreamaticus pulls together all the right ingredients for a best-selling novel. Diane Abbott agreed enthusiastically. If only Sir Malcolm could return from the dead to pass on this news to a major publisher…