Monthly Archives: February 2023

A colour-blind colleague (Rousse)

I told my colleagues that I wanted a grey leaving party. My formerly miserable colleague PT exhibited great enthusiasm for the plans. However, he broke the rules by turning up with a huge, brown, chocolate cake.

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How to clean an iPad (Rousse)

EH told me not to worry as she placed her iPad mini on the top rack of the dishwasher. ‘It’s perfectly safe’ she said. ‘This is the way that all the young people clean their tablets these days.’

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Monkey business (Belle)

My new business venture – selling vinyl records at a stall in the local church – seemed to be going so well. My fellow stall holders were delighted with the turnout. However, I failed to check my handbag, and when … Continue reading

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Countryside dangers (Rousse)

First I was nearly trampled by a herd of black cattle running away from a swarm of flies. Then I got caught up in MS’s fishing line, with multiple tiny hooks embedded in the white flesh of my left arm. … Continue reading

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Belle’s birthday treat (Rousse)

It was Belle’s birthday. She invited us all to go to the cinema with her. While we were queuing to pay for our tickets, I noticed a poster for a post-film pub quiz. I was keen to take part in … Continue reading

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Donald Trump will run for President: exclusive interview from David Elstein’s offices (Rousse)

Donald Trump’s fall from power was so great that he now worked in advertising sales for David Elstein’s media empire. My good friend JM also worked for Elstein, so gave me access to the once ‘great’ man. One day I … Continue reading

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Ape World attractions (Rousse)

I took the coach to Ape World with a bunch of school friends. All were in the same form as me, but with the exception of KM, they were in a different class. Amongst my travelling companions were Dippy Dawn … Continue reading

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Holiday home pros and cons (Rousse)

At the top of the hill, I jumped off the bike and passed it to PMF. This was because I was too scared to negotiate the steep incline on the other side. He would ride, and I would run behind … Continue reading

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Tubby topless teen teacher (Belle)

I was out for my afternoon walk when I saw a pasty shirtless teenage boy dancing salsa with a middle aged woman. He was twirling her around and calling out the steps – “One, two, THREE, four”, and she was … Continue reading

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Wellies at work (Rousse)

Four inches of water lay across the floor of every lift in the office building. This explained the new fashion for work footwear: green wellies.

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