Tag Archives: death

How to get to Paris by car (Rousse)

Posted on November 26, 2011 by Dreamaticus

I dyed my hair dark grey for KM’s parents’ golden wedding anniversary party. From a distance it looked like my head was armoured in a heavy steel helmet. Regretting my mistake, I couldn’t decide whether I should wait for this … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged anniversary, border, car, charm, death, documents, driving, dye, father, France, French, golden, haor, helmet, immigration, lane, lanes, officer, Paris, party, shipping, skinhead, tanker, tankers, TPR, wedding | Leave a comment

A misguided love affair, a talking ape, a fairground murder, and three clear advantages of a prison sentence (Rousse)

Posted on November 10, 2011 by Dreamaticus

We spent the day at Belle’s London office counselling a friend desperate to escape a loveless marriage. When X refused to reveal to me the identity of his mistress, yet hinted that Belle was in the know, I feared the … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged accomplice, accomplices, ape, arsonist, arsonists, attack, bags, blaze, blog, blonde, body, book, brother, brothers, camera, CCTV, cell, cells, children, city, cloth, clothes, clothing, compensation, conference, corpse, death, deceased, doorway, Dreamaticus, elope, face, fairground, fingerprints, fire, fun fair, hairdresser, heat, hiding, history, illegal, immigrant, immigrants, injuries, jacket, Junior, kids, laughing, lease, library, Liverpool, London, love, marriage, mistress, monkey, motive, murder, mystery, office, orangutan, packing, pension, peroxide, photo, photograph, picture, pictures, police, prison, revenge, Russian, sentence, South Bank, stab, stall, street, turban, victim, wall, watch, woman, wounded, wounds | 1 Comment

Gangsta rap death threat (Rousse)

Posted on October 31, 2011 by Dreamaticus

As the process of erosion slipped into fast forward, we witnessed the course of the river shift before our very eyes. The sandy banks were crumbling so quickly that all hands were called to fetch shovels and spades to dig … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged bank, court, death, door, erosion, gangsta, gangster, head, lawyer, Leith Walk, lift, murder, office, paternoster, pedestrians, price, rap, river, sand, threat, TPR | Leave a comment

Walking in Glencoe bereft of map and boots, but with Take That (Rousse)

Posted on October 16, 2011 by Dreamaticus

I was the reluctant leader of a small running club expedition to Glencoe. Unqualified for the role, I was making a complete mess of it. First, we arrived far too late in the afternoon to tackle any of the interesting … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged Amazon, atlas, boots, boyfriend, chip, climb, climbs, date, death, die, Edinburgh, Glencoe, hill, hills, leader, legend, legends, map, mountain, mountains, music, myth, myths, niece, Ordnance Survey, route, routes, running, shoe, shoes, stood up, Take That, taste, tastes, TPR, trainer, trainers, walk, walking, world | Leave a comment

Traffic terror on the A1 and a reunion with the Spice Girls (Rousse)

Posted on October 13, 2011 by Dreamaticus

The traffic on the A1 north of Newcastle was blocked solid. The only way you could now join the carriageway was to first reverse up the ramp, then continue along the hard shoulder backwards until you found a suitable spot … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged A1, accident, advice, bike, car, carriageway, chorus, cycle, cyclist, Deacon Blue, dead, death, drive, driving, fashion, field, grave, graves, hard shoulder, millionaire, Newcastle, Posh Spice, queue, ramp, reunion, Saturday, singing, song, Spice Girls, terror, TPR, traffic, Victoria Beckham | Leave a comment

Secret military airbase at Edinburgh airport harbours unexpected relations (Rousse)

Posted on October 6, 2011 by Dreamaticus

I knew that it was too good to be true, but this didn’t stop my enjoying the company of my long-dead aunt, uncle and grandmother when I stumbled across them living happily together in a small house on the edge … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged airbase, airport, alcohol, athletes, aunt, auntie, baggy, brother, children, computer, cousins, dead, death, dentist, drinking, Edinburgh, facilities, fit, Frankie says, gloom, Glow, grandmother, granny, hack, hacking, house, Kate Middleton, kids, military, plumbing, royal, screen, secret, siblings, sister, slim, souvenir, T shirt, teacher, toilets, tomato juice, uncle, wedding, wine | Leave a comment

Murder in the machair (Rousse)

Posted on October 1, 2011 by Dreamaticus

Although I had no idea what I was doing here, I recognised the familiar Harris landscape: islands, hills and the single track road, the perfect combination for cycling holidays by tandem. The official pushed open the roadside gate and led … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged beach, bodies, body, cliff, confess, confession, death, gate, Harris, hills, holiday, holidays. official, interrogation, island, islands, machair, murder, Outer Hebrides, questioning, sea, Seilebost, shore, single-track, tandem, Western Isles | Leave a comment

The “sad camel” look in Grantham (Rousse)

Posted on September 25, 2011 by Dreamaticus

My grandmother returned from the dead for a day trip to Grantham by train. I was delighted to see her after almost two decades. However, my happiness turned to horror when we approached an outdoor jumble sale and I spotted … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged beige, camel, clothing, dead, death, Grantham, jumble, junk, north, sad, sale, town, train | Leave a comment

Cat fashion up a tower block (Rousse)

Posted on September 24, 2011 by Dreamaticus

The small black furry corpse spilled out of my green leather handbag onto the floor of E’s office high up the new tower block. To my shame I had completely forgotten that the poor creature had been in there. I … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged black, block twoer block, cat, coat, corpse, dead, death, die, drink, dye, dyed, eat, ensemble, fashion, flat, flats, fluffy, furry, green, hair, hairless, handbag, health, kill, killed, leather, neglect, office, owner, pet, purple, tower, tumour, white | Leave a comment

Do you wear underwear with leather trousers? Is a tandem a useful weapon? How do you converse with the dead? Rousse investigates…

Posted on July 28, 2011 by Dreamaticus

I sat with the Spanish holiday-makers in the leaky summer house looking out at the torrential rain. It had been pouring for weeks. Would the sun ever make an appearance this “summer”? Bored with the weather, I made a dash … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged bike, car, cycle, dead, death, drinkers, drinking, flat, job, leather, litter, murder, park, picnic, pub, rain, Spaniards, summer, summer house, tandem, TPR, trousers, underwear, victim, weapon, weather | Leave a comment