Cat attack (Rousse)

The cats attacked me from all sides. They climbed into my handbag and under my clothes. The most vicious one sunk its jaws into my left hand. All my attempts to shake it free were in vain. I was in agony.

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Antique oils, Hebburn foam, and pet dolphins (Rousse)

My parents bought a huge Tudor mansion plus all its contents, including a priceless haul of antique oil paintings that lined the walls next to the massive oak staircase.

On the day that I visited, my cousin R was guarding the supply of Hebburn foam that he kept hidden behind the fireplace in an upstairs room. Meanwhile, below in the courtyard, my mother was leading some other visitors to the outdoor spa so that they could visit the pet dolphins.

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A weight-busting walk to Tom Robinson’s Stokesley (Rousse)

The only way to lose weight was to take more exercise. My new regime was ambitious: to walk the mountain route from the south of Scotland to North Yorkshire on a regular basis.

I wasn’t the only one with this idea. One day I passed a small set of soaked school boys in their Edinburgh Academy uniforms following the same path over the hills.

I never actually managed to complete the entire route by foot. There was always someone who picked me up along the way. However, my final destination was always the same. This was Tom Robinson’s house at 12 West Green in the village of Stokesley.

The house had changed since my regular visits in the 1970s. Someone had built a bungalow in the front garden, and its beautiful Georgian frontage had been covered by a hideous modern stone design. However, inside the house the two staircases remained intact, and my friend K’s mother was still the best hostess to teenage girls on a sleepover.

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A haul of hopeless academics (Rousse)

Once again I had disappointed my boss with my lack of financial acumen.

Meanwhile I was advising another colleague to be very careful over the content of his e-mail correspondence, and a former colleague was despairing at the cheek of another who thought it appropriate to publish from his decade-old PhD thesis.

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Extreme watersports, a spot of ski-ing, and a very clean baby (Rousse)

Our activity holiday comprised water sports with JC, then ski-ing with S and T.

I was actually quite frightened when it came to swimming here. JC had already hurt herself when she slipped on the rocks at the loch side, and I was terrified when I realised that I would have to jump from a height of 100 feet into the water.

The ski-ing arrangements were less demanding, and the hotel staff went out of their way to ensure that we could use the facilities right up until 7pm on the day of our departure. Their only condition was that we showered with the baby afterwards.

“That baby will be very clean by the end of the evening”, I concluded.

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Munro bagging for beginners (Rousse)

I overheard a seasoned Munro bagger speaking to my parents.

“How far are you walking?” he asked.

“Oh, only about 10 miles,” answered my father. “Just over the hill and back again with our three girls”.

The man glanced at my mother’s tiny rucksack and shook his head. “You need to be much better equipped for that distance” he instructed.

He was right. I remembered how CM would always take an ice axe for the shortest of distances, even in mid-summer. I would have to go back indoors and switch my flimsy sandals for sturdy walking boots.

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Quidditch team selection rules (Rousse)

Heroku’s latest release was a Quidditch-like game designed by my friend J. It was played with small, brightly coloured plastic sticks and a puck.

J was very particular in his requirements when it came to choosing teams. He was not prepared to accept a single social scientist on his side. Only mathematicians and physicists would be welcomed.

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Mother-in-law Christmas packing genius (Rousse)

While I sleeping my mother-in-law put up a Christmas tree at the foot of my bed. She then scattered dozens of presents underneath it.

When I awoke to this amazing display just one thought popped into my head: how on earth had she managed to fit all this into her packing?

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Scottish midges damage Inverness housing market prospects (Rousse)

We were looking around a new housing development in Inverness. Amongst the large modern yellow sandstone “executive homes” were grey monochrome Scooby Doo mansions, covered in creeper with their windows boarded up.

“Let’s buy one of the wrecks and renovate it!” I begged TPR.

“No way”, he replied. “This is Inverness. Just imagine the midge problem in the summer.”

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Australian dinosaur surprise (Rousse)

Although it was the middle of December, I was luxuriating in the warmth of summer thanks to a speaking invitation at a conference in Australia. Dressed in a light cotton skirt, I wandered through the grounds of the conference centre admiring the exotic wildlife. I planned to return later with my camera to photograph the colourful birds.

I was just wondering whether I would be lucky enough to see an elephant when I turned a corner and came face-to-face with a ferocious dinosaur. It roared, and I fled.

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