A failed family get-together at Newcastle-by-the-sea (Rousse)

Posted on February 21, 2017 by Dreamaticus

Newcastle city centre was packed on the first Saturday after the January pay-day. We should never have agreed to meet my mother and sister S there.

As things turned out, we didn’t manage to find one another. This was because TPR and I ended up wandering through the terraced streets of Jesmond then spent the afternoon in a biology student’s flat on the beach.

My mother and S could not contact us because TPR had (as usual) forgotten to pack his mobile, and my iPhone was out of power. Even if they had got through, my mother would not have managed the walk from the city centre to the beach to meet us.

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Delicious dead dog pâté (Rousse)

Posted on February 19, 2017 by Dreamaticus

When the dog failed to respond to neither the cries of its owner, nor my whistling, we first assumed that it was lost in the forest. Sadly, we later discovered its little corpse on a bed of autumn leaves.

Keen not to waste the body, we butchered the animal. Then we cooked the meat in an elaborate process using four glass chambers to create the most delicious dead dog pâté.

We were unsure whether to serve this delicacy to dogs only, or whether it would also be fit for human consumption.

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Computer criminal caught in the act (Rousse)

Posted on February 18, 2017 by Dreamaticus

I caught my former colleague MH illegally sneaking into the office in the middle of the night to use the University’s computer facilities.

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Wife discovers real reason why husband married her (Rousse)

Posted on February 17, 2017 by Dreamaticus

It was in a tiny shared house in Swindon that I finally understood that TPR did not love me. For years he had been in a secret relationship with OC, and his role as my husband was just a front. This explained his lack of interest in decorating, and his failure to appreciate my distress at the peeling green wallpaper in the porch.

All this came to light the day that I cycled to the gym for a swim – forgetting to lock my bike, leaving my towel at home, and nearly getting killed crossing the main road.

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Birthday log book refusal ruins friendship (Rousse)

Posted on February 14, 2017 by Dreamaticus

TDX barged into my office, with a lackey in tow, and demanded my log book.

I said that I was not prepared to give this to her. Her eyes narrowed and she raised her voice in anger. I now knew that our friendship (and possibly my career too) were over.

She was particularly annoyed that I was disobeying her on her birthday.

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High energy Rousse

Posted on February 13, 2017 by Dreamaticus

My energy levels were so high that I bounded along as if in flight.

I urged the others to join in the fun, but only NY was interested.

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Twins, a five-legged soccer creature, and a lost football pitch (Rousse)

Posted on February 13, 2017 by Dreamaticus

I accompanied the twin eight year-olds (already kitted out in white football strips) to the vast park. Here I was told that we would easily find the pitch.

We set off as directed. I related tales of a five-legged soccer animal along the way.

Sadly we never found the pitch, and I lost both children.

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Television time delayed due to water allergy (Rousse)

Posted on February 13, 2017 by Dreamaticus

My sister JMH and brother-in-law had added another extension to their house. This was an enormous bathroom off the kitchen. Its ‘walls’ were made of canvas and decorated with swirly orange 1970s patterns.

In the kitchen itself they had installed a massive television screen to the ceiling. This could be lowered to a vertical position for family viewing.

I was looking forward to catching up on some programmes later. JMH promised that we could do so soon. First, however, as she had to send home AMF’s friend because she was allergic to water.

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The long route from Glasgow to Edinburgh (Rousse)

Posted on February 11, 2017 by Dreamaticus

My brother-in-law MF was driving our car with TPR in the passenger seat. I was in the back with another brother-in-law, RH.

It was going to be a long day. Our route was (1) Glasgow to Wisborough Green to drop off MF, then (2) to London for our third visit in a week (to drop off RH), and (3) a final leg back to Edinburgh.

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Decline in international standards at doctoral level (Rousse)

Posted on February 11, 2017 by Dreamaticus

The senior examiner M-LH was ready to approve the award of PhD, and it looked that GW would also agree with this outcome. However, I was adamant that the student make major corrections to the thesis.

This said something to me about the declining international standards of work at doctoral level.

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