Category Archives: Uncategorized

James Corden, Johnny Vegas, and a couple of neglected twins (Rousse)

Posted on May 19, 2014 by Dreamaticus

James Corden – or was it Johnny Vegas? – was the father of my twin baby sons. In our unconventional family set-up he did his best to care for the children while I was at work, but never thought to … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged baby, care, children, condition, diagnose, eczema, exercise, family, father, game, James Corden, Johnny Vegas, juggle, kids, Michael Joseph Pennington, neglect, shrink, Stuart, tea saucer, treat, twin, twins, work | Leave a comment

Husband leaves wife of 27 years for 18 year old (Rousse)

Posted on May 18, 2014 by Dreamaticus

TPR had been behaving rather strangely of late, and now I knew why. He was leaving me for a slim, glossy dark-haired, 18 year-old sixth former. I tried to show the girl friendship, but in reality I was preparing to … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged 18 year old, 50th, bait, birthday, candidate, celebrations, dark, friendship, girl, husband, kill, lies, love, own, party, replacement, sister, slim, teenage, teenager, TPR, wife, years | Leave a comment

All eyes on the designer – and not the bride (Rousse)

Posted on May 16, 2014 by Dreamaticus

Normally all eyes would be on the bride, but MSB looked so beautiful in her modest office outfit of vintage-style 1950s hyacinth blue satin underwear (a tape measure in her hand) that on wedding days crowds gathered at the studio … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged 1950s, award, blue stain, bride, client, clients, crowds, designer, eyes, modest, office, outfit, studio, tape measure, underwear, vintage, wedding, win, window | Leave a comment

Barber Bruce Forsyth (Rousse)

Posted on May 15, 2014 by Dreamaticus

Bruce Forsyth ran into the room brandishing a pair of barber’s scissors. “Would you mind washing your hair in another bathroom love?” he asked. “I’ve got a client in for a hair cut.” I said that would be fine, picked … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged 1970s, barber, bathroom, buffet, catchphrase, client, conveyor belt, cut, hair, room, run, scissors, shout, table, wash | Leave a comment

Kidnapped by acrobats (Rousse)

Posted on May 14, 2014 by Dreamaticus

DT, TPR, LA and I met in a crowded bar. DT’s orange messenger-style handbag slipped off the back of the chair onto the floor and I stretched down to pick it up for her. It was at that moment that … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged acrobat, acrobats, audience, back, bag, bar, beg, chair, conference, dirty, exercise, feet, floor, gloves, handbag, hillside, invisible. performance, invite, kidnap, mask, messenger, moneky, newspaper, professional, release, remember, rocky, rubber, running, scruffy, sleep, spectator, steep, talent, throw, tough, training, tricks, twon, wall | Leave a comment

Christmas plans 2014 (Rousse)

Posted on May 14, 2014 by Dreamaticus

It was Christmas Eve and all that I had bought for the next day’s celebrations was a frozen turkey. There wasn’t a single carrot or brussel sprout in the house. Tesco would be heaving, and I doubted that the little … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged 2014, brussel, carrot, celebrations, Christmas, Christmas Eve, foot, frozen, galley, house, Kenton Close, kitchen, leg, market, meal, parents, plans, road, sprout, Stockton-on-Tees, surface, tarmac, Tesco, turkey | Leave a comment

Brilliance and sweeties at a Nordic lecture (Rousse)

Posted on May 13, 2014 by Dreamaticus

I didn’t recognised the speaker when she took the stage. “Who’s that?” I asked GW. “MH” she replied. “We all used to be terrified of her brilliance, but now we’re quite used to her”. I settled into my seat to … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged academics, auditorium, brilliance, candy, colleague, lecture, Nordic, seat, speaker, stage, sweeties, sweets | Leave a comment

A record deal with Simon Cowell (Rousse)

Posted on May 12, 2014 by Dreamaticus

Simon Cowell was much shorter than I could have possibly imagined. I tried not to stare at his stumpy little legs when he waddled over to join us. For the sake of my niece’s singing career however, I really needed … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged career, contract, deal, label, legs, little, news, niece, record, recording, short, signing, Simon Cowell, singing, stumpy | Leave a comment

German treasure trove reveals its secrets (Rousse)

Posted on May 9, 2014 by Dreamaticus

TPR was the jumping champion. He was the first person who had ever managed to leap from a standing start at the bottom of the pit on to the turf above. Everyone had said that it was impossible, yet my … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged bull, chains, champion, chest, children, contents, farmer, forget, German, gold, helmet, helmets, hero, husband, jewels, jump, kitchen, lid, pile, pit, room, secret, secrets, teacher, TPR, treasure, trove, turf, Viking, work, yard | Leave a comment

Boris Johnson’s PhD (Rousse)

Posted on May 8, 2014 by Dreamaticus

Boris Johnson’s PhD thesis was so ancient that the yellowing paper cracked as you turned the pages. Presented in two battered cream-cloth bound volumes, the content was somewhat disappointing. I’d hoped that it would come in useful as I did … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged authority, Boris, Boris Johnson, cloth, company, contact, crack, cream, dissertation, doctoral, doctorate, expedition, fishing, industry, Johnson, Linlithgow, pages, paper, PhD, spy, study, Sun Microsystems, text, thesis, uni, volume, volumes, work, yellow | Leave a comment