Author Archives: Dreamaticus

Sympathy and ping pong (Rousse)

When XY broke down in tears in my room I realised that the only way to comfort him would be to invite him into my bed. Between sobs he listed many injustices others waged against his research projects, using this … Continue reading →

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The fish-eating fake vegan (Rousse)

My office-mate was up to his usual annoying habits, behaving as if he had exclusive use of our shared room. He’d taken my poster off the door and replaced it with a congratulatory banner for his final year class. He … Continue reading →

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Cycling academics, poor publishing standards, diet Coke rations, a farewell disco, and stiletto heels (Rousse)

I cycled to work to mark the last day of operation of Queen Margaret’s Corstorphine campus. Many other Edinburgh academics did the same, discussing the poor standard of journal submissions as they rode the route. Because it was such a … Continue reading →

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An over-ambitious walk (Rousse)

My school friends PM, SR and I embarked on a ludicrous 200 mile walk from Edinburgh to Hexham and back. Our goal was to cover the course in one day. We didn’t make it.

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Queen and Duke of Edinburgh spend Christmas with commoners in Northumberland (Rousse)

The Queen and the Duke of Edinburgh decided to break with tradition and spend Christmas away from Sandringham. Instead of surrounding themselves with members of their own family, the royal couple accepted an invitation to celebrate the festivities at my … Continue reading →

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Scandal of Yorkshire tourist information office that charges visitors to look at the moon (Rousse)

We visited widower K in a Yorkshire village. He, along with his two small sons and daughter, seemed to be coping well since the death of his wife. I noticed that the little girl’s nails needed cutting, but she knew … Continue reading →

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An orphan’s treat cut short (Rousse)

I volunteered to help with the orphans by taking charge of a very snotty two year old. A male colleague and I chaperoned the toddler around town following instructions issued by a lady dressed in a brown tartan outfit. Unfortunately … Continue reading →

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Richard Osman: unrequited love, unwanted sprouts (Belle)

I was in the back seat of a car driven by Richard Osman.  As I looked out of the window I once again felt the sharp pain of unrequited love.  He parked the car and dashed into his house, returning with … Continue reading →

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David Mitchell’s photography one-upmanship lands university professor in trouble (Rousse)

David Mitchell showed me his DSLR camera and its a full range of lenses. It was then – two days into our two week holiday touring the Scottish highlands – that I realised that I only had the telephoto lens … Continue reading →

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Films stars and seals meet their maker on Devon beach (Rousse)

TPR sat on a bar stool at the other end of the café. While chatting away to some random woman, he glanced in my direction and winked the message “Don’t worry, I know I’m yours. I’ll be over to you … Continue reading →

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