An impromptu pedicure with Jose Mourinho (Belle)

Posted on December 21, 2018 by Dreamaticus

The football apprentices were housed in a derelict farm building and we were standing on a farm gate staring in at their sad little faces. Then their manager Jose Mourinho turned up and demanded that they perform impromptu pedicures on me and my companion. I felt humiliated for myself and the footballers. If only I’d shaved my toes!

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

From Birmingham to Edinburgh by Lomax (Rousse)

Posted on December 20, 2018 by Dreamaticus

I lost all sense of urgency to catch a train from Birmingham New Street to London, knowing that another would be along in fifteen minutes. What I failed to appreciate was that I had to reach the capital by a certain time in order to catch the connecting service to Edinburgh.

In the end I left it far too late and my only option for heading home now was in a Lomax with DMcL.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Fine art tips from a hairdresser (Rousse)

Posted on December 17, 2018 by Dreamaticus

I fancied myself as a fine art dealer, so I angled for a part-time position working in an antiques emporium run by my hairdresser.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Last minute accommodation in Glasgow (Rousse)

Posted on December 9, 2018 by Dreamaticus

The timing of the AGM at midnight assumed that all participants were also delegates at the conference with overnight accommodation booked in Glasgow.

This was not the case for me and CW. We had travelled over from Edinburgh for the meeting only, so now we were stuck in Glasgow with nowhere to stay at a time of night when no trains were running. I suggested that we cross the motorway and see if any of the budget hotels on the other side of town happened to have a room for us.

When we walked out into the plaza I noticed a group of middle-aged women. As we neared them I realised that I knew them all. Here were the T twins, RF, JS and a whole load of others from my year group at school. Best of all, JP (now JC) was with them. I quickly confirmed that they had hotel rooms for the night and booked my spot in JC’s bed. It sounded like there would also be room there for CW too.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Smoking spliffs in the sunshine (Rousse)

Posted on December 8, 2018 by Dreamaticus

In the scorching heat at a family picnic JMH and JLR sat on the car bonnet and smoked spliffs. Meanwhile FDS played in the sunshine and I sheltered in the shade.

We returned home by tram along the yellow painted roller-coaster tracks that led down the from Pentlands hills towards the Firth of Forth, just past Edinburgh airport.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Super speedy 125 leaves passengers in canal (Rousse)

Posted on December 7, 2018 by Dreamaticus

I had never travelled on so fast a train before.  Its speed was nearer 150mph than 125. It didn’t even slow for the stations, but instead whipped past the platforms  in a terrifying haste.

The train only slowed when it reached the Midlands canal basin. Here TPR had the bright idea of disembarking for a short while so that we could play on the boats that bobbed in the water. GW joined us, tugging his very own dinghy behind him.

We immediately regretted our decision when the train started up again and left us stranded in the canal. There was no way that we could row fast enough to catch up with it, and we were now sure to miss all our appointments in London.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

A dip in the cold (Rousse)

Posted on December 6, 2018 by Dreamaticus

I was telling my sister an elaborate tale of undergraduate risk (how could I ever have been so stupid?) as we approached the beautiful Italian swimming pool.

I was not tempted to take a dip – it was far too cold – but when my mother bravely dropped into the water, my sister followed.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

A cave holiday with a two-husband trip to Edinburgh Zoo (Rousse)

Posted on December 5, 2018 by Dreamaticus

TPR booked an unheated cave for our summer holiday in the far north of Scotland. Although compact, its floor-space was still greater than our first house in Birmingham. Red curtains at the ‘door way’ mouth provided adequate privacy.

When my second husband – BB – joined us for the weekend, we made an outing to Edinburgh Zoo. On arrival we noticed that some of the dog-goats had escaped their entrance enclosure. Then I remembered that SM had warned us about this – on Saturdays the animals are allowed to roam free, with all visitors warned that they enter the zoo at their own peril.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Driving backwards to a dinner date (Rousse)

Posted on December 4, 2018 by Dreamaticus

My mother put the Volvo into reverse, swivelled the driver’s seat to face the back of the car, and drove backwards along the dual carriageway. She disregarded my warnings that she risked crashing into the lorry behind us that was now in front.

Later we met JC, her mother, her sister (normally based in Australia) and her old boss (who was paying) for a meal out in Manchester.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Trolley dolly meets step mommy (Belle)

Posted on December 3, 2018 by Dreamaticus

I was wheeling a trolley of tea and digestive biscuits on an intercity train when the incident happened. My excitable behaviour resulted in a spillage over a passenger’s lap.

The train guard told me the person I had spilled tea on was my future step-mother, Natasha. I seemed to have forgotten how normal people behaved. I got great pleasure in pronouncing her name “Nat-osha” and chanted it loudly throughout the train.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment