Tag Archives: cleaner

Illegal immigrant civil engineer offers advice for an ample bosom (Rousse)

Posted on August 2, 2025 by Dreamaticus

Had I been a couple of feet closer to the passageway, the man who emerged backwards carrying a long rake could have decapitated me. I should have paid more attention when I first saw the broom and hosepipe stacked up … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged bosom, bra, broom, civil, cleaner, council, deportation, Edinburgh, engineer, hosepipe, immigrant, man, Melgund Terrace, Nigeria, passageway, police, rake, street | Leave a comment

Axe-wielding climate change protesters damage personal property (Rousse)

Posted on July 2, 2025 by Dreamaticus

I ran back to the train carriage just in time to collect my forgotten belongings. A few seconds later, and the cleaners would have scooped up everything for disposal. Out of the station and onto the Edinburgh streets, I ran … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged business, cardigan, cashmere, change, cleaner, climate, Edinburgh, host, hotel, Lothian Road, meeting, protest, station, student, teacher, train, training, visitor | Leave a comment

Hair bobble clues point to sub-standard cleaning (Rousse)

Posted on May 31, 2025 by Dreamaticus

Under a thick layer of dust beneath our bed, I found three hair bobbles. What were they doing there, and why hadn’t our cleaner J found them? More to the point, when had she last cleaned under the bed? Of … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged bedcover, bedroom, bobble, cleaner, cleaning, clue, dust, hear, joke, laugh, poor, TPR | Leave a comment

A cat and a cleaner (Rousse)

Posted on October 16, 2022 by Dreamaticus

My former neighbour JS cradled a beautiful tabby cat in her arms. It was a leaving present from her friends. The cat, however, was not the focus of our conversation. Rather, JS wanted to show her displeasure at my nephew … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged cat, cleaner, friend, leaving, neighbour, nephew, present | Leave a comment

A blonde mistress upgrade for an errant husband (Rousse)

Posted on October 16, 2018 by Dreamaticus

Not only was I able (or stupid enough) to forgive TPR’s latest misdemeanour, but here I was comforting his latest conquest. Without any care for the feelings of the betrayed wife, the dumpy, blonde, middle-aged lecturer sobbed in my arms, … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged betray, blonde, cleaner, conquest, errant, husband, improvement, love, mistress, Robert Gordon University, sob, tart, taste, TPR, upgrade, wife | Leave a comment

Tamsin Greig caught up in sewage crisis (Rousse)

Posted on April 3, 2018 by Dreamaticus

No wonder our tiny bathroom was awash with debris from the domestic sewage system. There were simply far too many people in the house, and the drains could no longer cope with the increased use of the facilities. Somehow TPR … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged awash, bathroom, bed, bedroom, carpet, cleaner, crisis, divan, domestic, door, drain, floor, green, sewage, sleep, system, Tamsin Greig, Thursday, tile, visitor, wardrobe | Leave a comment

A messy office Christmas party followed by seaside coffee and cake in Aberdeen (Rousse)

Posted on March 18, 2018 by Dreamaticus

A mixture of colleagues from all stages of my career came to the staff Christmas party. These included: my old boss JH; the wife and eldest daughter of my old office-mate SM; current colleagues DB and LD; a tall, skinny, … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged Aberdeen, boss, cafe, cake, Christmas, cleaner, coffee, colleague, daughter, fancy, floor, mess, messy, morning, moustache, note, office-mate, party, seaside, sleep, tidy, university, wife | Leave a comment

Cleaner sacked over hacking allegations (Rousse)

Posted on February 15, 2015 by Dreamaticus

All I asked her to do was to print an invoice that I had already prepared. When I discovered that the cleaner had spent most of the afternoon working her way through the contents of my computer, I had no … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged afternoon, cleaner, computer, content, contents, dismiss, fire, invoice, let go, print, sack | Leave a comment

Chocolate compensates for a disastrous first date (Belle)

Posted on October 22, 2012 by Dreamaticus

This was a disastrous first date and I had resorted to hiding in the toilet to plan my escape. Things got even worse when my date’s ‘cleaner/girlfriend’ let herself into the flat. A drop-dead gorgeous multi-tasker, she managed to do … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged chocolate, cleaner, date, flat, girlfriend, Mint Aero, Terry's Chocolate Orange, toilet | Leave a comment

Con-woman cleaner confuses clients with ridiculous rates of pay (Rousse)

Posted on September 30, 2012 by Dreamaticus

The plump red-headed woman offered her services to us as a cleaner. What made her work superior (so she claimed) was her approach to doing the laundry, and the sliding scale for each type of service. I didn’t buy into … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged buttons, cleaner, detergent, dusting, gear, ginger, hoovering, laundry, muddy, polishing, red-haired, red-head, red-headed, sports, washing, washing machine, wiping | Leave a comment