Tag Archives: china

Premature plane ticket purchase (Rousse)

I was already annoyed that my colleague had submitted a conference contribution without first sharing his work for review with the rest of the team When I found out that he had already bought return first class return flights to … Continue reading

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Louis Theroux’s lover (Rousse)

I helped clear the ornaments from the table. Now that the last green china dog was hidden, nobody would ever suspect that Louis Theroux was having an affair. I was not the object of Louis’ affections, sadly. Although he listened … Continue reading

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Prime Minister Boris Johnson lies about fish (Rousse)

Boris Johnston stuck his hand into the drawer of random cutlery and pulled out a flat four inch fish-shaped piece of steel. ‘Excellent, a Tudor fish knife!’ he declared. He was, of course, wrong. The metal might¬† have been fashioned … Continue reading

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Victorian dental bills, exotic animals and a marriage (Belle)

It was ‘Victorian times’ and a mysterious stranger gave me ¬£50 to undertake a voyage to Australia to get my teeth fixed. My plan was to gather exotic animals while I was there, transport them back to London and sell … Continue reading

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Displaying a nipple and swimming with baby dolphins in lockdown (Rousse)

Campus was open again. I was there once more attending lectures, and they were even measuring the water levels in the swimming pool. On most days I sat next to my primary school ‘friend’ ST, delighted that I was admitted … Continue reading

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Glow-in-the-dark prayer gloves are the latest daytime TV sensation (Rousse)

Glow-in-the-dark prayer gloves were all the rage, not least due to their practicality for night-time worship. Their provenance was important too. Unlike competitor products they were not made in China by infidels. Belle was making a fortune advertising them on … Continue reading

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AC/DC in concert in China (Rousse)

AC/DC were playing in China. Since I was there on a work trip I decided to go along to the concert. BP made a block booking of tickets and organised for us to reach the venue by coach (which I … Continue reading

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Fine bone china and a Swatch watch (Rousse)

After years of admiring them in the china cabinet, I took my grandmother’s teacups to work. CI and I enjoyed fine Earl Grey tea from the fine bone china while avoiding XY. I was also free and easy with some … Continue reading

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The Emperor of China, Tom Forrest, an absent wife, and a widower (Rousse)

Ancient tradition in China required the donning of a long black robe (similar to an academic gown) whenever the emperor visited. Every day during my imprisonment I was on standby for this eventuality. Meanwhile I joined in with the activities … Continue reading

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Facilities at the best hotel in China (Rousse)

On a recent business trip I enjoyed the facilities of the best hotel in China. Each room boasted: A bathroom mirror that was so sophisticated that it could show you the state of the back of your teeth; A cellophane-wrapped … Continue reading

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