I had heard much about the fabulous parties that were hosted by the residents of Trinity (Edinburgh), and at last was invited to one! I turned up early at S and AC’s house to find them laying out the last of the dishes on the dining room table.

It all looked delicious. I was convinced that SC must have spent the past three days in the kitchen. It was therefore something of a disappointment to learn that most of the food was bought ready-made at LIDL.

We had plans to travel to Loch Lomond for water-sports after the party. AC checked that I had brought all the right equipment. He was not happy with my choice of aquatic footwear. He demanded that I immediately order a pair of clear plastic jelly shoes from Amazon. I was reluctant to do so, mainly because such footwear reminded me of the poor people of my childhood.