Tag Archives: arrest

Arrested by the Donald Trump militia (Belle)

Posted on September 29, 2024 by Dreamaticus

I was standing in the middle of a packed sports hall in a Mediterranean country when a group of armed men, dressed in black, pounced on me and arrested me for “sedition against Donald Trump”. Later my travel companions came … Continue reading →

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Sailor ditches assets in bid to fake 9/11 death (Rousse)

Posted on May 29, 2024 by Dreamaticus

A lack of sailing qualifications was apparently no barrier to buying a yacht, especially when the owner was in such a hurry to sell. Our new boat came with a lower deck stuffed with smaller vessels, and a resident black … Continue reading →

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Secret ceramics slicer swindler (Rousse)

Posted on May 4, 2024 by Dreamaticus

I knew that I had overstayed my welcome, living out of the contents of two large black bin bags in the spare room of my new, elderly friends. My gift of three pretty decorated saucers cut in half was probably … Continue reading →

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Yellow perils on the streets of the Edinburgh New Town (Rousse)

Posted on December 9, 2022 by Dreamaticus

The entire class – along with PC, who was calling himself Tom Mortimer – squeezed into a tiny yellow mini. Former PhD candidate LK took the wheel. We bumped across the Edinburgh cobbles into Moray Place. When I pointed out … Continue reading →

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Curry versus keynote (Rousse)

Posted on August 22, 2022 by Dreamaticus

There was barely half an hour before the opening keynote speech and I still hadn’t finished preparing the chicken curry that I had promised for dinner for day 2 of the conference. As soon as the sessions started, I would … Continue reading →

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Cash-collecting criminal caught on CCTV (Rousse)

Posted on February 14, 2021 by Dreamaticus

I added to my fortune whenever I paid a visit to the cash dispenser just outside Edinburgh’s Balmoral Hotel. Here each morning on my way to work, I pretended to make a transaction. In reality, I was picking up wads … Continue reading →

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Belle the librarian serves Rousse the criminal (Rousse)

Posted on April 27, 2018 by Dreamaticus

It was a tough route up the concrete staircase in the cold to the main library of Birmingham City University, but so worth the struggle to be greeted by squeals of joy from Belle, on duty at the main enquiry … Continue reading →

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Hostage held in shared bath (Rousse)

Posted on February 7, 2016 by Dreamaticus

SL sat opposite me in our shared bath. “It feels like my friends are holding me under house arrest” she complained. “If this is the case, it’s probably for your own good”, I replied.

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Salford scheme shames poor drivers (Rousse)

Posted on April 12, 2015 by Dreamaticus

My driving was getting worse. In Salford I scraped our white BMW against the kerb outside a hospital, nearly taking out some nursing staff. Thankfully the car easily transformed into a motorbike. This meant that I could make a quick … Continue reading →

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Pink go-cart girls avoid police arrest (Rousse)

Posted on March 13, 2015 by Dreamaticus

‘You’re lucky that I am not going to arrest you’ said the police officer as she slammed the door of her patrol car. ‘Oh, what’s wrong with our pink go-cart?’ I enquired in a fashion as innocent as I could … Continue reading →

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