I travelled to Finland where I expected to take up EH’s old job. (This was a mistake. EH turns out to be a German academic based in Ireland.)
Because I was planning to leave the country, I also had to untangle myself from TPR. We walked the streets hand-in-hand considering which would be the least painful way to split up. I argued that perhaps we could make things easier for ourselves by embarking on a long-distance relationship. TPR was unconvinced.
“How did you sleep?” I asked Belle. “Not well at all” she replied. Unfortunately for her she had bedded down after the party in the room next to the staircase that led to my sister S’s bedroom. S and her pals had stayed up all night making tea and toast, playing cards, and laughing loudly on the landing.
I had no time to chat, so made an apologetic grunt then set off out the door to a dental appointment, then back home to collect my overnight bag for a work trip to Paris.
Imagine my surprise when I discovered that the new dentist was none other than JH. All these years we’d thought that he’d earned his living as a planner.
Trying to park in London was hopeless. I aimed for Oxford Street, but found myself in Kensington. I eventually ended up in the countryside beneath an amazing waterfall.
The weather was terrible and I was miles away from home – but I was being looked after by a bearded Leandro who sang to me between kisses 🙂
I travelled back in time to my favourite guest house on the Isle of Lewis where the computers looked at least a decade out of date, and what I knew as a toilet block was a tumbled down black house.
I was in such a muddle over everyone’s annual leave requests that my only option was to buy a year planner for my office wall. This would do nothing for my popularity at work.
I came across a very pretty village just off the A702. “We could live here”, I thought “And be close to N and S”.
The only drawback was the queue of pensioners jumping in pairs to their death from the bridge across the river. In the water below us we could see hundreds of stolen iPhones, iPads and iPad minis on the river bed, just beneath the floating corpses.
Two boys from my class at school came to collect my dreams. “Please be careful with them” I begged as I handed them over to ST and PN. “They’re very precious, and I need to remember them for my blog”.
Dreamaticus 