You could say that it was my own fault that 9 year-old Tory stole my bike. TPR would be aghast to learn that I had left it unlocked outside the pharmacy, even if I argued that I was in a ‘nice’ part of Teesside.

I scoured the ads on Facebook Marketplace to see if Tory was trying to sell my steed. However, it looked like he was keeping it for himself.