Monthly Archives: August 2012

A Jack Vettriano original (Rousse)

Usually I didn’t have much to do with my widowed colleague X. His fearsome office wife guarded him jealously with an arrogant form of possessiveness that bordered on the pathological. In short, if you came too close, she’d make it … Continue reading

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Rousse forgets to dress

For a change I turned left as I passed through the gate, climbed the hill, and headed out along the coast road. Just outside the hotel gates a rather rough wedding party was gathered. The poor podgy bridesmaid wore a … Continue reading

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Nightmare at the Olympics (Belle)

For a horrifying ten minutes, I was drafted into the Chinese men’s doubles table tennis semi-final match. As I walked towards the table in the arena, an official admitted the administrative error and took the bat out of my hands.  … Continue reading

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The unfaithful husband (Rousse)

To coincide with his retirement TPR admitted that over the course of our 25-year marriage he had slept with 21 different women (or 22, if he included me). Of these, he paid six for their services. I was relieved that … Continue reading

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Rousse recommends Rentokil

I’d offered again and again to help, but this time it really was too late. K had finally admitted to her affair with Terry and (unsurprisingly) her boyfriend J had thrown her out. The only place that she could go … Continue reading

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Hairy Star Wars sidekick Chewbacca comes to take Rousse home

I arrived at the guest house by airborne bike. I had followed the route along the cycle path from its source in the Meadows, all the way to the white cliffs, taking care not to knock over the hundreds of … Continue reading

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Alex Kapranos’ baby (Rousse)

As was the tradition in my family, a member of the next generation volunteered to give birth to the child of a celebrity. So now I was a great aunt, and my 16-year old niece AF the mother of Alex … Continue reading

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JK Rowling bakes a mean meringue (Rousse)

This is the tale of the day that JK Rowling and I finally secured our friendship. It didn’t start well… BR scolded me. He couldn’t understand why I thought it acceptable to walk the length of the railway line completely … Continue reading

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