I felt very honoured that Birmingham City manager Alex McLeish was my driver. From my position on the back seat I leant forward to chat to my former student JM. He was excited about the trip because he had plans to visit MB, now living in a village at the far north of the Isle of Lewis. I tried to fathom out how JM could possibly know MB. The former graduated in the early 2000s from one university, the latter much earlier (1993?) from another institution. Were all my former charges ganging up together?

Lewis had changed in the time that I had been away. Most striking was how the beaches had been transformed into bright yellow sandpit playgrounds packed with tourists. I had hoped to show off the remote beauty of the Outer Hebrides to my friend NY, but this was now impossible.

A date was organised for my driving test: next Thursday. Everyone thought I was mad to agree to be examined so soon. They didn’t realise that although I rarely took the wheel, I had held a licence for 20 years, so I’d be absolutely fine.