A702 bike thefts (Rousse)

Posted on October 8, 2022 by Dreamaticus

The huge traffic jam on the A702 held up all travellers, including cyclists (like TPR on my bike) and runners (including me). When the lights finally changed, we were pleased to take to the road again – until TPR remembered that he had left my bike behind at the side of the road.

By the time that we rushed back to the hedge where we had been waiting, pre-teen criminals had already lifted my bike, taken the wheels off, and scorched all identifying marks from its bodywork. They had done the same for all other unattended bikes.

Their long-haired greasy father grinned from ear-to-ear as we pleaded for the return of our belongings, claiming that they were now longer ours, but now his.

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Brad Pitt in the bedroom (Rousse)

Posted on October 8, 2022 by Dreamaticus

Brad Pitt was in our bedroom, stretched out on a single bed, chatting to TPR (his new best friend). I wondered if Brad could introduce me to Hugh Grant?

It was so funny when SC came into the room and didn’t notice our A lister guest.

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Orange running shoe thief (Rousse)

Posted on October 7, 2022 by Dreamaticus

I was going to run back, but the route was all uphill and sitting on the tram was a more attractive option. Once inside the carriage, I was even able to take off my orange running shoes and pop them into my grey handbag.

Of course, I forgot the bag when I left the tram. I returned to look for my running shoes only to find that someone else was already wearing them. The woman’s husband had even had time to shave down the heels and soles to his wife’s requirements, so now the shoes were of no use to me at all. I let the woman keep them.

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From Ellansgate to Quatre Bras, Hexham (Rousse)

Posted on October 5, 2022 by Dreamaticus

So few people used Ellansgate in Hexham these days that the former tarmac road was now an overgrown rooted path.

At the junction with Quatre Bras I showed SL the old salmon pool, the obedient yellow ducklings, and the tall, thin, 26-room, white-bricked house that I used to call home.

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Camera takes a dip in a Lanarkshire loch (Rousse)

Posted on October 3, 2022 by Dreamaticus

We climbed through the steep woods of Lanarkshire, then over the heath to the loch. Our nephew FG did well to keep up with us.

I was the first to reach the ridge above the water. I laid my camera down on the grass – from where it rolled downhill. I ran into the loch to retrieve it from the waves, calling for TPR at the top of my voice.

Further along the shoreline, chatting to the others, TPR could not hear me. Not only was I soaked through, but now I was also completely hoarse.

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The Princess Royal, a self-driving car, and a road traffic accident (Rousse)

Posted on October 3, 2022 by Dreamaticus

While Princess Anne drove, I told her all about my new self-driving car.

‘It’s amazing in multi-storey car parks’, I boasted. ‘It can even loop other vehicles when coming down the exit ramp’.

The only drawback that I had noticed so far was the car’s confusion when it entered a pedestrian zone. This happened to me in Birmingham city centre. Even the car’s specialist binoculars were of no use to help it navigate to a road.

Then I changed the subject to the Princess Royal’s hair. How long was it exactly?

The Princess shrugged off my enquiry, more concerned that there was an accident ahead. If we were held up in traffic, she would be sure to be recognised and then her safety compromised.

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Medieval tapestries in Cambridge (Rousse)

Posted on September 27, 2022 by Dreamaticus

I came across KS in Cambridge, keen to see the medieval tapestries that I had catalogued. I showed her into the exhibition.

I didn’t dare ask why she wasn’t at home caring for her demented husband.

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Hollywood hands (Rousse)

Posted on September 27, 2022 by Dreamaticus

JS and I met out old university friend JG on a grassy bank. Dressed in a huge 1980s style fawn jacket over jeans, there was something rather strange about his demeanour.

We learnt that he had suffered a stroke that had disabled the left side of his body. This explained much – including the static, plastic-looking ‘Hollywood hand’ hanging from the cuff of his left sleeve.

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Saturday night discos at Edinburgh airport (Rousse)

Posted on September 27, 2022 by Dreamaticus

The posh man to the left of me asked if we would be going to the Saturday night disco at Edinburgh airport. He assured me that the music would be to our tastes – but then I realised that I already had a commitment that night so couldn’t join him there.

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A boat trip to Greenock (Rousse)

Posted on September 25, 2022 by Dreamaticus

I couldn’t reach SD’s house in Stirling in time for our book group meeting so made a separate arrangement to meet LM in Greenock.

While I streamed the gathering in SD’s garden to my phone, I negotiated the ticket barrier and fierce railway station staff to catch a train west.

This ‘train’ was, in fact, a small boat. It carried a mix of passengers, including school children and a couple of people on stretchers, across the choppy sea to an island in the distance.

LM was nowhere to be seen. Perhaps meeting at book group in Stirling would have been an easier option for us both?

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