At the top of the hill, I jumped off the bike and passed it to PMF. This was because I was too scared to negotiate the steep incline on the other side. He would ride, and I would run behind him.

Our destination was P and C’s new holiday home. They had bought a flat above a shop in a village just outside Manchester. I couldn’t work out whether the permanent funfair that ran every weekend in the ground directly opposite the flat was a bonus, or a terrible post-purchase shock.

The shop below sold cut-price Highland Stoneware seconds. This counted as an advantage of the location – at least to me.