TPR interpreted the ban on cars on Edinburgh’s Princes Street as applicable only to vehicles that travelled forwards. This gave him a clear conscience to put his black BMW into reverse and head west along Princes Street with his eyes firmly fixed on his rear view mirror.

The police eventually caught up with him on a country road on the outskirts of town. He was taken into custody to a room crammed with other miscreants.

Meanwhile I petted a friendly fallow deer while considering the purchase of a roomy turquoise patterned bathing costume ‘for the older lady’.