TPR finally confessed that he had been unfaithful to me for years, having slept with numerous women from the very start of his career. I was not entirely surprised, but it was a real shock that he was leaving me for Rebecca, his most recent conquest. Distraught, I sped west along Edinburgh’s Princes Street on my mother’s mobility scooter into the face of east-bound traffic.

Having survived my perilous journey, I abandoned the scooter in a side street and entered an art gallery shop. Here I picked up two Paisley silk lined cashmere scarves and bit into them. Because I tore the material, I now had buy them. This was not a cheap purchase at £140.

At the till, I told the cashier and the other queuing customers that I really had no choice as to how to spend the rest of my life. I would move to Canada and marry BD.