I finally understood that TPR’s really did intend to divorce me. This was on the day that he told me (in front of his boys’ book group friends) that he would not be sleeping on the sofa bed that night, but ‘going out’ instead.

So this was it. Without him, what meaning would there be in the rest of my life? How would our families and friends cope with this awful and unexpected news? Would I ever find another partner? How? Was there any chance that J would have me?

The single advantage of my newly single status was that I could experiment with online dating, and then be eligible to contribute to FR’s research.