Following the previous year’s success, I invited my colleagues at Scottish Enterprise back on campus for a week. This time, however, they treated their visit as a jolly, crowding around my computer singing along to karaoke videos on YouTube. As ring-leader, IS egged on his theatrical friends.

Before long my colleagues across the corridor made it known that they were not happy with this arrangement. I managed to persuade the visitors to tone it down for a while. However, when the boss brought in two dogs with the obvious intention of starting a black Labrador breeding programme on campus, I knew that it was time to act.

I called a meeting at which the visitors would given the opportunity to explain the purpose of their visit and the means by which this would be achieved. The auditorium was packed – so much so, that I felt obliged to offer my knee as a seat to a young man in a heavy hi-visibility vest. I later discovered that he was a police officer in a Kevlar jacket, there to protect us from terrorists.

Just who, exactly, had I been harbouring in my office for a week?