We travelled by grey marble chopping board to the north east of England. In Redcar I asked our driver (BC) two questions: (1) why were we going by way of the beach; and (2) wouldn’t a taxi be a better form of transport, especially if it were to rain?

BC replied that it was much easier to steer the chopping board over sand than it was on tarmac, and that she was certain that it wouldn’t rain because she had checked the weather forecast earlier in the day.