BG was not happy to hear that I was about to climb into bed with JG in front of all the party guests.

‘What if something happens?’, she complained.

‘Nothing will’, I assured her – because, in reality, I was more interested in eating tangerines than sleeping with her husband. (In any case I was now wondering if I would rather take a bath than spent the afternoon snuggled up to JG.)

BG stormed out of the house with a mixing bowl in her hand. I found her later making a cake outside on the other side of the main road. She confessed that she often baked outdoors in a bid to avoid the chaos of family life.