‘There’s a huge hairy monster making a terrible racket in room C44!’ I screamed down the phone to security. What I didn’t tell them was that this was a monster of our own making. We’d created it using a graphics package on the PC in my office.

Soon afterwards, at the far end of the corridor, I met our new dean of school. She said that under her leadership there would be many staff socials. ‘You’ll be lucky to round everyone up at once’, I muttered under my breath as I stepped into the school office. There I picked up some instructions for leading a couple of sessions with staff later in term. I checked my calendar to see if I was free on the dates selected. By some miracle I was.

Later I sneaked out to the shops with the other research centre directors. The sales were on and there were bargains to be had. Unfortunately I was pickpocketed within a couple of minutes of walking into the main street.