I was dreading the journey: a transatlantic flight in economy. As soon as the fasten seat belt sign went out I made my move for the on-board lavatory, as did many of my fellow passengers. Rather than wait in a queue in economy, I pushed through the heavy curtains into business class. The cabin was barely half full, and when a small blonde stewardess spotted me she rushed over to offer me a seat.

Apparently I was just the “type” for business class, even though I had only paid the economy fare. If I were to accept her offer, here I would be given a huge reclining seat and access to the tables and computers at the back of the cabin.

Unfortunately TPR did not make the minimum entry requirements, and he was doomed to remain in economy.