Belle and I took twenty pairs of stretchy nylon Marks and Spencer knickers in flesh tones to the event, just in case anyone needed a pair. Nobody did.

Afterwards my father paid the bill then we all wandered off to catch the bus home. It was a while since my last journey along Yarm Road in Stockton-on-Tees, but I was pretty sure that last time I looked Cadbury did not have its Victorian headquarters next to the Richard Hind School. My sister J was just as incredulous as I that I had never noticed the building before: the familiar purple branding was hardly subtle.

Just at the point that Hartburn Lane becomes Darlington Road, the bus broke down. We had no choice but to walk the rest of the way home. This would not be easy for Belle in her six-inch purple satin stilettos.