Christmas was suddenly upon us and we had made no preparations whatsoever by the assumed date of our drinks party. Our friends piled round to the house regardless, many early in the day with suitcases expecting to be accommodated overnight.

So now we had a catering crisis on our hands. Would the butcher supply cocktail sausages at such short notice? Did we have enough supplies in the kitchen cupboards to make mince pies and mini quiches? What about the party playlist? What were we to do about the state of the house in general, including the cobwebs on the landing?

I offered to run along the road to the butcher, our guests argued that we should use ready-made pastry, and MC said that he would sort out the music. I would also deal with the housework.

In the meantime I needed to shift the Christmas choir that had taken up residence in our hall.