With my sister at the wheel of our motorhome, we were driving south through France to the drop off my niece A and her partner D at a ski resort. It was a wonder that we weren’t killed en route. My sister insisted on driving on the left hand side of the road, forcing the oncoming vehicles to cross the carriageway to avoid colliding with us.

Unfortunately the tiny 4-inch high monkey (seated with us on the back seat) didn’t survive the journey. Somehow it got trapped under one of the other passengers. The first sign of its distress was bleeding from the eyes. Soon afterwards its entire body disintegrated into a bloody blob.