I was returning the keys of the Lomax so that someone else could take it for a drive when a woman at the sink shrieked.

‘It’s Elaine’s head – as a baby!” she shouted ‘And several more of them coming out of the plug hole and the overflow!’

A few of us peered over, horrified to see several miniature newborns with enormous heads emerge from the plumbing. I wanted to make a run for it like everyone else, but I couldn’t just leave the two huge piles of our belongings on the floor. It was especially important that I completed the packing because TPR and I needed to audit everything for division at the point of our divorce.

I raced to stuff everything into the suitcases and bags before one (or more) of the ugly pink babies leapt off the draining board and selected me for motherhood.