I met the illegitimate man of Thomastown at Brian and Jennifer Aldridge’s drinks party. He had thoughtfully brought with him a 3D paper model of Thomastown complete with an impressive representation of the Catholic church, and it didn’t take long for me to spot the top of the hill where JG and his family lives. Although the man hadn’t met the G family, as soon as I mentioned JG’s son F he knew who I was talking about. The topic of conversation then moved on to the sponsorship of gigs.

The party transferred to Princes Street where we sat at trestle tables outside the Vodaphone shop. A student approached us to ask me a question. The others shooed her away, screaming that I should be left to eat in peace. This made me feel like a celebrity.

MMcG was also at my table. I knew I had some business advice for him but – very annoyingly – I had forgotten what it was.