Jeremy Clarkson had been sacked so my long-awaited appearance on Top Gear was cancelled. However, the disgraced TV star still honoured our date.

First he cooked for me and DB. Breakfast was a huge plate of black bacon.

Then he granted me an interview on the topic of his departure from the BBC. It turned out that this was nothing to do with an assault, but with 31 mysterious text messages sent by his producer.