How I loathed these ‘Team Spirit’ events. ‘Corporate Aria Idol’ was just about the worst idea ever. I had been paired with my sister J to perform at the end of the evening. I didn’t know the tune and the only reason I knew the words was because I had bought a song-sheet on eBay.

When I tracked my sister down to express my concerns she was too busy enjoying herself to rehearse or even talk to me. Once again I was going to humiliate myself.

Later, I travelled by zip wire through the entire country estate. This was part of my secret agent training.