TPR thought £500 was an extortionate amount to spend on one night at a hotel – no matter how posh it was – as did I, so we were both astonished that CO and AM had booked in for an entire week.

We were also intrigued with the antique bicycle that CO had brought on holiday with him. It was an extremely rickety model from the early twentieth century. Painted black, it sported an Irn Bru logo in the form of an iron shield just above the front wheel. When I had a go at riding it the handlebars came away from the frame. There was a special skill required here, and I didn’t have it.