My in-laws were experienced in earthquake emergency prodedures. They simply followed the drill to lie down on the floor until the last of the shocks had passed through the West Sussex village of Birdham. Meanwhile I did all I could to conceal my panic.

Afterwards TPR passed around a handout about an Edinburgh weekend that he had planned for the family in summer 2012. This proved an interesting diversion for the rest of us as we sunbathed on the patio.