My work life was falling to pieces:

• the only computer available to me for running a complex statistical package was an ancient XT;
• my first tutorial of the academic year lasted only 30 minutes because I hadn’t prepared enough material;
• I was forced to field student complaints about a colleague unsure as to whether or not these had any grounds;
• the green booklet for my pirate hooch treasure hunt outreach project came back from the print room littered with typos.

No wonder PC and I retreated to my office where we consumed vast quantities of hard drugs in an attempt to alleviate the stress of the start of the new academic year.