The cafe was set up in a timber Amazonian forest tree house and was staffed by handsome young men. I was astonished to learn that if you flipped the ‘Brazilian blackboards’ over you could read the scores allocated by the staff to customers for their performance in bed. I was less astonished to learn that S, my neighbour, was at the top of the scoreboard, averaging a score of more than 9 out of 10 for every encounter.