I was sitting next to J near the front of the theatre for the closing scene of the pantomime and the entire cast was jumping around in shaving foam. I was particularly enjoying the rhyming scheme and chuckled at how the line ‘a man is getting excited by the icing on the gateau’ was being rhymed with a line ending ‘chateau’. Had J written all these lines herself or were they taken from a west end production?

Earlier, my unusual injuries had meant that I had to stop at the firestation in Ladywell to call an ambulance. I was better before they came to collect me.