I was working for the Marquis of Bath, even though I felt queazy every time I heard him use the word ‘wifelet’. I needed to get rid of all the broken glass in the cinema and impressed a group of strangers with my efficient gathering up of all Henry the Hoover’s attachments. But when I got to the cinema, the movie had started. ‘Born Free’ again, I thought. All the school children in the cinema were being played by 20-year old actors, as if we were all in a 1970s sitcom. Unable to hoover I sat down and picked up a blue tablet somone had left for me.