I was on time for the property law lecture yet it had already started. It seemed I was a whizz at the subject and pretty soon I was the young lecturer’s favourite. We became friends and went around college together. It was him who pointed out the comically fat toddler’s resemblance to Winston Churchill.

A work colleague made me sit in a cupboard so she could talk about how put upon she was. I agreed. It wasn’t fair that she worked 90 hours a week while her boss was a strict 9-5 man. But before I could come up with any suggestions, I wanted her to watch an animated presentation I had put together. Every picture had a meaning and should I make the daisies appear to grow faster?

I was on the top of the bus looking at Bhutan in flames. I was astonished that the buildings on fire were all 1930s British style tenements. However, at the summit the millionaires’ mansions remained untouched.

In the shop that sold fashionable clothes for children I picked up a purple t-shirt with a girl’s name with the initials BJ. Everyone else sniggered but I couldn’t see how funny it was until much later. My friends seemed genuinely shocked I understood the joke, albeit hours later.